When someone is in hospital it can often be a very emotional time, even more when it involves a child and probably more so when it is a baby. As Charlie was less than 9 months by the time he had his 4 open heart surgeries we were lucky in that he knew very little of what was going on, i say very little becouse he did know something i will tell you about that another time.
As parents, we knew of everything that was going on with Charlie and our emotions were running high and low durring those 9 months, a really low point was when we were told that if surgery wasn't succesful then the outlook wouldn't be good, here's what happened on that very bleak day back in 2007 whilst at GOSH after his second ohs.
It was about a week after Charlie's 2nd ohs when he had an echo, if the echo showed no problems then we would be allowed home but it did, it showed that that something wasn't quite right but they couldn't be sure till the next morning so we were told that we couldn't go home till after they had discussed it. The next day the consultants were doing their daily rounds speaking with parents about thier child and what was to be done, there were several babies in our bay and the consultants talked to all of the parents but when they came to us they told us they needed to speak to us privatly. We went to a private room where a consultant and a nurse were waiting, they sat us down and began by telling us that the wall of Charlie's heart was starting to collapse and that he needed further ohs, we were devastated but there was worse to come. We were told that if they coudn't repair the problem then he would need a heart transplant but with Charlie being so small there probably wouldn't be a heart available, we couldn't believe what we were hearing and became very upset. We were moved to a private room where a few days later we were told by the consultant who didn't mince her words that there was a high chance that Charlie wouldn't make it, 20% was the risk factor of Charlie not pulling through or that they couldn't help him, 20% may not seem like a lot but its high for GOSH We were distraught but we knew we had to be strong for Charlie. The consultants had no expereince with this problem (in Charlie's condition) so they contacted there counter parts in America and Europe hoping that they could advise, they even called back Charlie's surgeon from Europe espeacially to carry out the surgery.
A while later we phoned our parents to tell them the bad news, i remember both of us standing outside GOSH entrance holding eachother tight fearing the worst and knew we had to call our parents. I phoned my mum while Shelly phoned hers and i remember saying hello then just breaking down before i could get another word out, what's the matter a voice kept saying on the other end, tell me, my mum kept saying but i couldn't, i kept crying and trying to say something as tears rolled down my face. Eventually i blurted out that Charlie needs another op and that he may not make it, we are on our way down said my mum, stay strong, we will be there tomorrow, we all knew that they were coming down to say goodbye to Charlie. The whole family including Shelly's came down the next day, we hugged and shed alot of tears as Charlie went into theatre knowing that it could be the last time we saw him alive.
After a 9 hour op we were relieved (an understatment) to hear that the surgery went well though the preffered option couldnt be done, they had to settle for the 3rd!!
Before and during the surgery we went to the hospital's church and prayed hard for Charlie, neither of us are religous but it helped us knowing that maybe there was a "higher being" helping Charlie and looking over him. It was a long anxious wait till we knew Charlie was ok, time was ticking by and they went over there expected time for the surgery, 2 hours over!!, we kept asking ICU if they knew anything but they didn't but i remember waiting in the waiting room just outside ICU watching for Charlie to be wheeled past us to ICU and that time finally came, we saw him being wheeled down and jumped out of our seats tears shedding as the surgeon came to us and told us he was ok, i shook his hand and thanked him perfusely then cried with joy as smiles beemed all over our faces and breathed a huge sigh of relief, cloud 9 was not an option, we were on cloud 99. We were home after 18 days as Charlie made a great recovery and surprised all the nurses and consultants.
When i ever talk about this time i always get upset, i even have tears rolling down my cheeks now as im typing but if it wasn't for the medical team at GOSH especially MR Tsang (Charlie's surgeon) Charlie wouldnt be here today so we all owe them a massive THANK YOU for saving Charlie's life, if it wasn't for them our tears would be never ending and i know that if it wasn't for the support my family gave me i wouldn't have coped as well as i did.
The day we were told he may not pull through was the worst day of our lives and i wouldn't wish it on anyone but sadly some parents go through a lot worse and do lose their child.
Thanks for reading, please feel free to comment
Steve
